24x36 pink gold green concrete Southern California at sunset jungle. Read on!

Before moving to San Diego I lived in Las Vegas. Every once and awhile I would take lots of deep breaths, try to clear my mind, and go art supply shopping at @blickartmaterials

I felt like such a fraud there I could barely stay in the store for five minutes before running out in tears. There were so many things in that store- professional things for professional artists. It was like every single jar and pot and brush - every item whispered to me “You don’t belong here. I’m for someone else. To go with you would be a waste.”

I got hired at @ironsideoyster as a server in San Diego. I would drive downtown, park a mile away in Bankers Hill and walk to the restaurant, on India Street.

1 shop down was @blicksandiego. I had to walk past it twice a day for three months before I felt ok with going in. I didn’t paint for a year because I had an insane job opening and managing a restaurant. I basically had time to buy lattes, get my nails filled, and work. But mostly just work.

I left that job. Started at ironside. Tried to fit in & just keep my head down.

The day I finally went into the Blicks I was so exhausted from my shift all of the “you suck” chatter was gone. I put anything interesting I saw into my basket as I had just been paid and didn’t care. How much could some paint be?

Well, it was $500 fucking dollars, you guys. I was so mortified I just paid it. If you’re shopping in the golden heavy body section- it’s expensive. But it is worth it. I even bought the canvas and carried it all uphill 😆

I came home, painted this. It was the first time I used the best paint money can buy and the pigment + textures reflect that. I have not looked back in regards to sticking with all @goldenpaints paints & mediums.

Flamingos probably don’t know what they look like, but they act like they do.

This is a work of accidental grace, progress, and transformation. If you’ve ever walked down India St on a Saturday at sunset after waiting on 670 people since 11 am you know this glow.

It’s like a light of silence at the end of the tunnel under the 5, focusing on the sunset as I would climb the giant hill to my car, one more time.